Allting i Min hand

C (G/B Am7) D7 Bm7 Em Am7 D7 G (G7)
C D7 B7 Em C D G G7

Jag är hos dig
när problemen tar all din tid
när ditt liv verkar meningslöst
då är Jag där!
Jag är hos dig
fast du inte kan tro det nu
fast du inte har märkt mig än
så finns Jag där!

Chorus:
Och Jag har allting i Min hand,
din framtid har Jag stakad ut
Jag vet ju allt vad du behöver dag för dag
Var inte rädd; Jag älskar dig!
Du kan lita på mitt ord
Och du skall se hur jag skal leda steg för steg

Var inte rädd
när du inte kan somna om;
när du tänker på nästa dag
du har ju Mig!
Var inte rädd
fastom andra kan glömma dig
fast du känner dig värdelös
Jag tror på dig!

(Chorus)

Tänk vilken dag
när vi möts efter färdens slut
och du ser att den väg du gått
var din väg till Mig;
då ska du se att i din väv
går en tråd genom allt
och förstå att Jag har allting i min hand!

Johan's personal reflections from Toronto

What I've done in Toronto:

• I was supposed to lead games when the occasion arised, but only ended up doing it once.
• I shared my testimony 4 times
• Lead bible study once, though it didn't go so well
• Tried to clean Ivy's kitchen
• Helped making one PowerPoint
• Lead one devotion for our team
• At the Evergreen/Yonge Street mission I was stationed at the employment center. Didn't do anything much except talk a little with some people there, mostly the other volunteer workeers.
• At Fusion Toronto I gave out lunches to a few homeless people, and prayed for one or two of them. But didn't really talk much with them. In the evening I chose to help doing dishes so I wouldn't have to talk with the people who came.
• Went to some youth meetings in the various churches, but didn't really get to know anyone new.
• Listened to the worship workshop, bible study workshop, and the RHCCC Youth Leadership program (how they organize their leader structure)

What I've learned:

• The leadership structure part was interesting, they have multiple "levels" of leaders, and also different other teams like worship team, multimedia/video team, a team for graphical design/posters, etc.
• Don't let Ivy go wild when ordering food
• When sharing about the reason I don't like talking with people, I said that it might be because I have a hard time understanding people because I have bad hearing. But last time we went to Toronto I shared that I had a hard time opening up to people, and that might actually be a bigger problem. I've built a wall around my heart, not allowing myself to get closer to anyone than to a certain point. I'm not even sure if that wall is still there, but I think that even if part of the wall might be gone, I'm so used to having it that I just don't know *how* to get close to anyone.
• For now I asked Ivy's recommendation for a book about relationships with people, and I bought the devotional book she recommended. I guess I'll start on it when I get back home to Oslo.
• When at the Fusion Toronto, the thought of actually having to talk with the homeless people that we were handing out sandwiches for made me feel sick. Not because they were homeless, but because I didn't want to talk with people.
• I'm afraid of talking with people? About God? Would I have been less reluctant if I knew that I didn't have to talk about God at all? Or is it because we were supposed to try and get to know a bit about the people we talked with? What if the pastor told us to hand them sandwiches and then talk about the weather?
• No, I guess the thing is, that no matter what I talk about, I'm just not interested in the answer. I can ask a person about their school or work, and when they reply, I just don't know what to do with their answer. In fact, if I ask something and the other person actually spends a long time explaining/talking, I might even start to get bored and wonder when they'll finish. I'm uninterested in anything in the world around me. That's why I'm so bad at geography, because I simply don't care. And that's also why I hate leading bible studies and being a group leader at summer camp, because I'm unable to want to listen to people.
• I enjoy being with people, but I'm unable to be interested in their lives much. I guess this is what you'd call self-centered... But is interest in other people something that can be learned? Something I can force myself to have? If it is forced, won't people just see that it's not genuine?
• Love others like you love yourself. I know the command. Sometimes I make the excuse that maybe I'm even unable to love myself. But if that was true I guess I wouldn't have tried so much to make me comfortable and have fun?
• So why am I unable to truly turn my focus away from me and towards other people? Or rather, what can I do to make me change? Will reading the devotional book I bought be enough?
• I have to pray that I can have a heart that loves and cares about other people.
• For a long time, I thought that Rev 3:16 strikes me the most, but now I think 1 Cor 13:1-3 strikes me more.
• And yet a lot of times when people describe me they'd say that I'm kind. I guess a lot of times when I can help people, I would and I usually do. Does not this already mean that I do love them? Or am I saying I'm doing it because I expect something in return? Am I expecting people to be my friends, and that's why I help them when they ask? And when people don't ask anything of me, I do nothing for them.
• Can kind actions replace a genuine interest in other people? But no, according to 1 Cor 13:3, it can't... or rather, is interest in other people equal to love? Can I say that I Iove another person if I'm not interested in their life? That doesn't sound plausible either though.
• Maybe what I really need to look into is why I feel uninterested in other people? Is it simply because of laziness? I don't want to be interested because if I do, I'm obliged to help them out? Or I'm afraid that I can't help them with their life trouble, so I don't want to give an impression that I can, by caring too much? But no, that's probably just thinking too much into it.
• Sometimes I think that the only reason I might seem interested in people is because I like girls, so I'm much more willing to try and be interested in whatever they're saying if it's a cute girl. If I somehow didn't like girls either, I feel I would probably never talk to anyone.
• I wasn't tired as often when in Toronto, I think because I actually slept 9 hours almost every day? So lack of sleep is very likely a reason for why I feel tired often back home, when I usually go to bed too late.
• I feel like I'm getting better at not scolding people when I feel they are doing something wrong, by recalling similar bad things that I've done myself when I feel like I might get angry.
• The short movie that was shown before Toy Story 3, Day and Night, also said something similar very well. One shouldn't dislike or get angry at other people just because they are different, like different things or do things in different ways.

Things we can apply to our church:

• We might be too small to have more layered leader structure, but we might be able to have some more "teams" other than the worship team to involve more of the youth in the youth group work. F.ex. website team or multimedia team or something.
• Actually at summer camp we do have a similar leader structure now.
• Maybe we could join some volunteer activities sometimes too in Oslo? I sometimes helped at a soup kitchen arranged by a church in Trondheim. Maybe we could do something similar in Oslo?
• Untill I am able to change my personality, I guess I will try and focus on the practical work as best I can... And try not to get angry at others because I feel that they don't help out with practical work. Because I'm not helping much with worship either.

Vilhelm's personal report

Day 1(Tuesday)  
Sleep

Day 2(Wednesday)  
Get lost in a huge building and met different pastors and co-workers, like counselor Ray(which we thought was pastor Ray, thanks for clearing that up for us Ray, when reading this cause I know you are) and assistant Gloria, youth pastor Kelly Tam, cantonese pastor Hermen, English pastor Fred and Daniel and Ho-mings mom Esther, shu ling worship pastor, pastor Irene and more I don't remember names of. We had a worship workshop where we learnt about practical ways to lead worship. And then we practiced some worship. For dinner we went to pastor Kelly's home were she made us a homemade meal. Really good thanks Kelly and Victor if your reading this.      

Day 3(Thursday)
We went to Evergreen with Gloria. There I met street youth. What I remember the most is that their concerns were different from normal kid, like how to pay rent, get cloth and other necessity with we take for granted. And that they acted somewhat the same way as normal youth in despise their situation, but with some exceptions. 
Afterwards we had a guide that guided us around young-street missions different programs and buildings. I remember the guide told us a story something about how they helped all type of people and that the best way to evangelize through good deeds not word.

Day 4(friday) 
We had a workshop with Ray on how to lead bible study. I learned that bible study is about getting the group to talk and share more than getting trough the bible study it self( which I got to use later in the trip).
Then I went to hong kong it seemed, cause of the cantonese Nexus fellowship. Where we had BBQ, but didn't get to eat cause we had to leave. I think it was to little time and didn't get to know to many people and that is a little sad. They reminded me of my cousins in HK.      

Day 5(Saturday)
Grill and chill, was fun and I talked some people that had been going to the church for a while. Pastor Daniel talked about community and 5 Ts 
Trust, time, tenderness, talk and truth. The order of the words are wrong but the meaning is still there. 

Day 6(Sunday)
Nerves is what I remember from this day. I shared my testimony in front of 70-100 people. What I remember the most is the people there were very in encouraging when i told them i was nervous, which made easier for me to share( if your reading this thank you). When we ate dinner, I talk to Gloria and she asked me and Hanfeng about why Jesus Christ only had to die once for all peoples sin( answer read day 17) I could not answer.  

Day 7(monday)
Wonderland

Day 8(Tuesday)
Prep 

Day 9 (wednesday)
Pray for aunties new church in northern Toronto that she and her husband can can do great work for God there. Amen

Day 10(Thursday)
Canada day got to know people. And met pastor Jim, his wife and son

Day 11(Friday)
Buy bread and groceries for fusion Toronto then go there.

Day 12(Saturday)
Here I learnt a little bit of how to talk to strangers.And that a lot of people need the gospel.

Day 13(Sunday)
Control of the tung (James 3) ivy preach this topic
And pastor andy talked about rut 

Day 14(Monday)
Day off

Day 15(Tuesday)
Read blog I cannot say it any better

Day 16(Wednesday)
Pray meeting thanks for the encouragement from auntie (I don't remember her name)

Day 17(Thursday)
Pray for the ability to do this in my speaking
"Urgent things, say it slowly.
Big things, say it clearly.
Small things, say it humorously.
Things uncertain, say it with caution.
Things that has not happened, don't say it in vain.
Things that you have not yet done, don’t boast about it.
Things that can hurt someone, don't say it.
Distasteful things, say it with focus on the issue rather than the person.
Happy things, say it depending on the occasion.
Sad things, don't say it to every single person.
Other people’s things, say it carefully.
Your own things, listen to your heart before you speak.
Current things, say it after you finish it.
Future things, say it in the future."
And Gloria found the answer to the question in 1 corinthians 15:22, got a follow up question
"was it not two people ,in this case Adam and eve, that caused the world to fall into sin. If not does that mean that if only eve ate of the fruit the world would not fall into sin, if so does that mean that women are less worth then men?"
I think I know the answer, but I want to know what you think.   

Day 18(Friday)
Bible study day 
Today I had lead bible study, which I was not totally prepared for, but as I lead the bible study from the pre made questions I was able to formulate questions that they could apply to their lives, that I had never thought of before I believe that is God working through me. And I got one of the participant to share their testimony, which I don't think I could make anyone do if it was not for God. And thanks to Elin for helping me prepare.

Day 19 Saturday
last day packing talking to people. Saying goodbye to ivy and glen giving them a farewell-gift and 2ball shirt. No one cried until we got to the gate which was just a few steps away from were we stood a few minutes before some of the girls started to cry. It made me feel bad for not crying. And our food went through yeah!  

I hope I didn't make this report to much like the blogs report and that it can give a insight on how I experienced the trip.
Here is some contact info if anyone want to fix my grammar, or just talk.
my mail is : vvilhelm@hotmail.com          

Day 19 (Saturday 10 July)

On our last day in Toronto we started by packing as much of our luggage as we could, before gathering in Ivy's living room for devotion and sharing. Some of the Toronto youth joined us as well. Around 12 o'clock Leon, Vilhelm and I had to leave to visit our relatives. We went with them to a dimsum restaurant for lunch, and then to a Chinese supermarket for some final shopping before leaving Toronto.

When we came back to Ivy's place we found out that most of the other youth had gone to T&T for some final shopping too. They eventually came back, and pastor Jim also came over because he was going to help drive us to the airport. We gave a gift to Ivy and Glen and told them how grateful we were for having us over again. Then we spent the rest of the evening in Ivy's place talking and socializing and finishing up our packing, before we left for the airport, where we had a tearful goodbye as we went to our flight...

All of us are really missing Toronto, although we were pretty tired and slept most of the time during our travels. Thanks to pastor Ho-Ming and his family and everyone at RHCCC for hosting and teaching us, and for pastor Ivy and Glen for hosting us and keeping us busy for two weeks! Thanks to Grace and Shiina and everyone else for helping drive us around! And thanks to God for letting us all have this awesome experience! Hope to see everyone in Toronto again, either there in Toronto or maybe in Norway (or Sweden)?

We will update the blog with personal reflections on what we've learned and experienced in Toronto. Probably after our summer camp though, since everyone will probably be pretty busy during camp.

Day 18 (Friday 9 July)

Some of the Toronto youth came over pretty early today. A bunch of people went shopping for lunch/brunch while others stayed behind to pack luggage and do other work. After lunch we practiced for the youth meeting we were going to in the evening, played through the worship and tried going through Vilhelm's and my bible studies. We went to Rice Paper Viethai Cuisine for another buffet dinner before going to the meeting place for the youth meeting. Due to some misunderstanding we ended up with almost double amount of food before we cancelled the rest of our food orders, and we had some hard time trying to eat up the food we got. Luckily we didn't end up having to pay for wasted food, even though we couldn't finish our gigantic plate of fried tofu.

At the youth meeting we led the worship, had a few games, and each of us in the Norwegian mission team shared a (supposedly) shorter version of our testimonies. It was kinda funny because almost everyone mentioned the SCCC Summer Camp, which was even more apparent now because we all shared our testimonies, instead of just three or so of us like we used to do before. Also I'm not entirely convinced that we were actually able to shorten our testimonies much, because we still used almost an hour for our 11 testimonies. But I guess it was fine.

After the testimonies we splitted up into two groups for the bible studies. I led the university group with Enoch, while Vilhelm led the younger group with Elin. According to Elin Vilhelm did pretty well leading the bible study! I'm not so sure about my leading though, I feel like I got a lot of help especially from Grace who said a lot of things that I probably should have said. The others in our mission team and Helen also helped moving the bible study forward. I feel that I'm just not good at following up on things that other people say... That asides we got a bit of sharing from all of the participants, so my leading aside, I guess it was an okay bible study.

Before leaving we had some group photos with most of the Norwegian mission team (minus Yat Yiu who left after our buffet dinner to visit some relatives) and with the other youth. The Toronto youth wanted us to go with them for some night activities, but we hadn't planned transport for this late so we eventually just went back home to Ivy's place.

Last day tomorrow! Only plans for that day are packing, seeing people for the last time and probably some crying, I think. My brothers and I are going to meet some relatives for lunch. Hopefully we'll still get a chance to see everyone before leaving!

Day 17 (Thursday 8 July)

After our morning devotion we had the communication workshop that we postponed from yesterday. Pastor Ivy shared about how to talk with people, things that we should avoid and be careful of, and what the bible said about communication with people. She also tasked us with finding bible verses about bad things like boasting and gossiping. She also gave us a translation of a Chinese poem. I ended up not taking any notes, but thankfully Enoch wrote down everything and sent it to us, so here is the poem:

Urgent things, say it slowly.
Big things, say it clearly.
Small things, say it humorously.
Things uncertain, say it with caution.
Things that has not happened, don't say it in vain.
Things that you have not yet done, don’t boast about it.
Things that can hurt someone, don't say it.
Distasteful things, say it with focus on the issue rather than the person.
Happy things, say it depending on the occasion.
Sad things, don't say it to every single person.
Other people’s things, say it carefully.
Your own things, listen to your heart before you speak.
Current things, say it after you finish it.
Future things, say it in the future.

I found the Chinese version online, posting it here in both simplified and traditional Chinese:

Simplified Chinese: 急事，慢慢的说； 大事，清楚的说； 小事，幽默的说； 没把握的事，谨慎的说； 没发生的事，不要胡说； 做不到的事，别乱说； 伤害人的事，不能说； 讨厌的事，对事不对人的说； 开心的事，看场合说； 伤心的事，不要见人就说； 别人的事，小心的说； 自己的事，听听自己的心怎么说； 现在的事，做了再说； 未来的事，未来再说；

Traditional Chinese: 急事，慢慢的說﹔ 大事，清楚的說﹔ 小事，幽默的說﹔ 沒把握的事，謹慎的說﹔ 沒發生的事，不要胡說﹔ 做不到的事，別亂說﹔ 傷害人的事，不能說﹔ 討厭的事，對事不對人的說﹔ 開心的事，看場合說﹔ 傷心的事，不要見人就說﹔ 別人的事，小心的說﹔ 自己的事，聽聽自己的心怎麼說﹔ 現在的事，做了再說﹔ 未來的事，未來再說

In the evening we went to auntie Helen’s place again to have our second worship workshop. Hanfeng led the workshop, which this time focused on more practical info like how to prepare a worship session, picking songs, etc. When the workshop ended, he had the Toronto youth practice planning and preparing for a worship session for a given topic, “Forgiveness”. It was a very touching and emotional time for the ETMAC youth when they practiced what they had been taught.

For dinner we went to Tenichi to have a sushi buffet with the Toronto youth, and also with pastor Jim and his family. Gloria also came after a while. We ate a lot and had a good time! Though I think they’re using less mango in the mango yoghurts now? They didn’t taste as sweet as before. But it was still quite good.

At night we went to watch Toy Story 3(D) with the other youth. (Elin won a free movie ticket from pastor Ivy because she found the verses we were tasked with finding. Tore won soda money for trying very hard.) It was a great and funny movie, we laughed a lot during the movie! And some of us might have cried. Possibly.

On Friday we’ll be having some more sharing and cleaning up before heading to the joint youth meeting in the evening, with the youth from NYMAC and ETMAC. Everyone in the Norwegian mission team is going to share a shortened version of our testimony. Also Johan (me) and Enoch is going to lead a bible study for the university age youth, and Vilhelm and Elin is going to lead for the school-age (younger) youth.

I can’t believe we’re already leaving on Saturday, we’ve had a great time with everyone we’ve met! Hopefully we’ll be able to come again, or maybe have some of them come over to Norway for a visit?

Day 13 and 14

Apparently we completely forgot to write about Sunday and Monday, so here's a short summary of those days.

Day 13 (Sunday 4 July)

In the morning we went to a service at NYMAC, pastor Steven's church, because pastor Ivy was invited to preach there. We led worship and pastor Ivy preached her message. After that service we went to the ETMAC, pastor Ivy's church, and we led worship with the adult seervice before going to our youth meeting where pastor Steven preached for us. In the evening we went to eat dinner at T&T.

Day 14 (Monday 5 July)

Monday was our day off. After our devotion we spent most of the time shopping. We went to P-Mall first, where we met up with some of the Toronto youth and walked around the mall with them. Then we splitted up, some of the youth went downtown to shop, while some others went to Ivy's place to relax. In the evening I went with Ivy, Vilhelm and Yat Yiu to fetch Moise at the airport.